This week I had a lot of tough decisions to make. In my Platinum Inner Circle program we call this “putting your big girl panties on.” (Sorry guys, it was on a magnet that someone gave me and it just stuck.) As a business and lifestyle coach, I see it as my main duty to follow the advice I give my clients.

I realized that there were some things piling up that were starting to get toxic and very distracting. Constantly I was ruminating in my head how to handle the situation. And yes, I even was a bit concerned about some of the decisions from a financial perspective — if I do this, will I lose this client — kinda thing.

But at the end of the day, I had to do what was best for me, my clients and the world around us. I call it the win-win-win decisions. If one person is losing in that equation then on some level we are all losing.

What I realized throughout this process was that I’m a business owner and every day I’m going to be faced with challenges. How I DECIDE to handle the challenges will dictate my experience. If I ruminate and worry, I’ll feel bad and my energy will go down the drain. If I “buck up” and make the best decision I can from a place of love, compassion and integrity while doing what I need for my business, then everyone wins — whether they realize it or not.

So far I’m through 5 of the 8 big decisions. I’ve got a few more to go. I choose to handle a few of the yucky ones first to get them handled and clear the energy. I’ve got another yucky conversation tomorrow and then a couple of scary-exciting decisions as I add someone to my team to manage my business development and map out some really big financial incentives for this role.

Interestingly enough as I have tackled these “yucky” situations I feel like someone is lifting rocks off my head. The pressure of what could happen is being replaced with victorious wins for both parties. Not once did someone yell at me or even feel angry but rather all concerned felt relieved and excited about the decisions.

It’s amazing what we make up in our head and project about what could happen vs. staying present to what is real.

I call this being a grown up business owner. We have to be willing to make the tough choices that continually align us with our desired outcomes and release the people, situations and opportunities that are not in alignment. Even when you want to run and hide…tackling the decision head on actually gives you more energy and power.

Here are a few questions that might help you make the decision:

• What is it costing you to keep this situation/person in your life? Money? Time? Energy? Lost opportunities?
• What is the worst case scenario? Best case scenario?
• What are the pros and cons of the situation? Are you willing to live with the cons in order to have the pros?
• If you had a million dollars, what decision would you make today?
• What would your [mentor/coach/role model] do to solve this problem?

So what tough decision do you need to make that will free up some energy and momentum? Would love have you share it here…

Not to long ago I signed up for a 9 week course that a friend of mine was putting on. I had all the best intentions to download the course and follow along…but I didn’t. Over the weekend I finally finished downloading all the materials …and…then nothing. I got sidetracked again.

I realized this wasn’t the first time for me. I did the same thing with Mark Joyner’s Simpleology. I also never finished listening to all the CDs from Nido Quebin (they got kind of boring so that’s my story on that one.) And I’m sure there are a few more somewhere that got started and never finished. And its not like this is a $25 book I buy from Barnes & Nobles on a whim that never gets read. These programs can be quite a chunk of change!

And then it occurred to me.

This is what happens to 90% of people who invest in some kind of self-study or virtual learning. We invest with all the right intentions but then we get busy with life and forget to follow through. 17 binders of information products later, they sit, stacked on a shelf or in boxes in a corner of our office, waiting for that day when we actually have time to do something with it.

The funniest story I ever heard was from a woman who had invested in my Virtual Team Building program. She was feeling “buyers remorse” with yet another purchase. She explained that she had invested in over $20k worth of programs in the last 2 years and recently just put them all on ebay and sold them. After helping her see some ways to break that pattern by actually implementing our program…she agreed not to put mine on ebay. =-)

Why do people invest in programs they never use? What is this compulsion we have to learn more stuff? What keeps people from following through on their commitments in an online program?

What I realized is that most self study type programs are not designed to keep people engaged. When you consider the avalanche of emails that we receive daily to the constant fires that we encounter that must be handled immediately, spending time on a self guided program tends to fall by the way side.

So what can you do as a participant to keep yourself engaged so you actually get a good return on your investment? Here are 4 insights I discovered by running my own experiment:

1. Get reconnected to the why. Why did you originally invest in it? What was the problem you wanted solved? I’m sure that didn’t go away magically.
2. Create a schedule to complete the program. If you paid $10k for an MBA would you not go to class? Well, if you went to San Diego State you might not but that’s not the point. Treat it like a class you have to attend live every week in order to “pass” and you’ll create a stronger connection to completing it.
3. Set up accountability. Too often the program shows up in the mail but there is no guidance or support for it. Get a business or success coach to hold you accountable or get a buddy to support you with weekly commitments. One of the ways we support our clients is we include a membership in our coaching community so they can get access to live support.
4. Delegate it. Just because you bought it doesn’t mean you have to learn it. I’ve given members of my team different programs that I want them to learn. If they are responsible for the strategy they might as well benefit from your investment too.

The most important thing is to not let too much time go by. The more time that passes the less painful the cost of not completing it. Its too easy to forget that you wasted that money. MAs the Nike commerical says, “Just do it!” Get going. Take yourself to coffee for an hour and just start the program. You’ll be glad you did later.

I keep seeing these funny articles in different magazines like “What does Carrie Underwood listen to?” or “What’s on Matt Lauer’s IPOD?” It struck me as kind of funny until the other day when someone asked me, “Melanie, what do you listen to that helps you have a success mindset?

For me, it happens in multiple ways. I’m a big proponent of creating a success environment that pulls you towards your goals. I can’t always be with my mastermind so I find ways to create that energy with or without them. Listening to audio programs helps!

Two of my favorite audio programs right now are:

• David Neagle’s Art of Success CDs. David is a very powerful wealth accelerator and has a way to teaching the Law of Attraction so it actually works!
• Zig Ziglar’s Closing Secrets. I love how he tells stories to help build rapport and connect with your prospect.
• ULTIMATE Wealth & Success Circle CDs. I actually do listen to my own CD series…I hear things from my monthly wealth experts that I often miss the first time.

I’m also a BIG music person and I have over 10,000 songs on my IPOD. I’ve got the monster big 80 G video IPOD and even though it’s a bit large I love it. I take it everywhere…in the car driving errands, to the gym or when I walking on my treadmill at home and even on planes or any time that I’m just chilling out.

Because music is so important to me, a cool song can get me hyped up and back on track too. Here are a few of my recent favorites:

• My new favorite song by Natasha Beddingfeld, “Pocketful of Sunshine”. I’ve been listening to this on french fry days. The days when things are getting a bit frustrating and you are wondering if it would be easier to just go tend the counter at McDonald’s.
• “New Soul” by Yael Naim. I love this cool little song that explores what it must be like to figure out how to be human and deal with each other’s idiosyncrasies.
• “Clumsy” by Fergie. I don’t know what it is but I just love her…maybe because she has such a smokin hot body and she has over come a lot of bad influences from her past. She has a real spiritual side to her which I like.
• Anything disco…I know, I know…but for some reason it just makes me want to dance and that lightens my mind immediately.

I also have all of my meditation CDs and the Goal-Setting and Procrastination Release tools from my ULTIMATE Success Generator loaded up. I listen to a track from these every morning to set my day in the right direction.

So what’s on YOUR IPOD that gets your head in the right place? What gets you motivated and ready for action? Feel free to share by posting your comments here.

I’m just back from speaking at another live event.

And I’m noticing a significant trend…

Conference producers who have all the right intentions but not the right turnout (aka not enough people show up.)

So what’s going on with that? Live events are probably one of the most significant ways to get access to the right education to turn your business around. But over and over again I find that it’s hard to get people to show up? Its not that we have a decline in entrepreneurs starting businesses as that is actually growing. And I watch the people in the room having these huge breakthroughs so I know being there works.

Here are some of the things I saw happen for people at that event:

• Learned about a strategy, tool or new way of thinking to get better results
• Made new contacts with people who can really help make things happen
• Eliminated feelings of isolation and replaced with new friendships and mentors
• Transcended the “online networking” with tools like Facebook and Twitter to having real connections with real people who actually get you and want to do business with you
• Discovered how other people are making their business successful and short cut your own path
• Tapped into the synergy and “mastermind energy” of a group and get a million dollar idea (this happened to me this weekend)
• Socialized outside of the event so that the “getting to know” part could be more real (hence, connections that survive beyond the biz card exchange.)

I can probably make a list a mile long of the benefits of live events. So what keeps people from accessing this kind of resource? I’d love to hear your thoughts…

• Is it too many choices for what to invest your time and money in?
• Not clear from the event materials why you should come?
• Afraid to spend the money to travel?

What could possibly keep you from attending an event in person with all these possibilities? Anyway, I’m on a bit of a rant but I am curious and would love to hear your input. No matter how hard we all try to make online learning and networking a valuable tool, there just is no way to replace what can happen  in person.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts by commenting on the blog…I’ll post mine after I hear from you…

Wow, this was one of the nicest places I’ve ever stayed.

I’m not typically a big Mexico enthusiast. Not being a big partier and knowing that the water in Mexico is always a risk to Montezuma’s Revenge, I tend to keep to the Caribbean and Hawaii for my exotic vacations.

As luck would have it, as we were planning our “birthday get away” two of the Hawaii airlines went bankrupt so ticket prices were insane. And I’m glad, because this trip was a slice of paradise.

Could it have been the 5-star service? Having a private butler? A concierge dedicated just to us? Great food at the Japanese restaurant and steak houses? The most amazing view of the ocean from our suite? The all-inclusive resort experience? Yep, all of that and more.

The lobby of our building, where our
butler and concierge are. This is actually where
we checked in…very nice to have the golf cart take
you directly to your building and not have long lines to check in.

The view from our ocean-front suite.

This is in front of one of the restaurants –
every place on the property seems to
have a fantastic view!

One of my two fav spots — in the pool on
my raft or in the cabana reading a book.
It wasn’t even a business book –
I finally dug into an Oprah’s book club
recommendation called Middlesex.

We left the property only once to go in to Cancun for
a nice dinner at Laguna Grill. It’s a Fodor’s Choice
and well worth the $140 US dollars to eat there.

This crocodile decided to join us for dinner
he swam right up to our table (which was on the lagoon)
and waited for us to share a tasty morsel with him.

The best part? While I was off recharging, my amazing team of virtual assistants keeps my business making money. I’ve built my business to make money with — or without — me being present. That’s one of the distinctions of a lifestyle business. Otherwise, you just have a job!

If it were not for the Mexican water, I’d go back in a heart beat. My only issue with the whole experience is that as a 5-star resort, they were giving out crappy locally bottled water. When we figured out what was bothering out stomachs, we asked for Evian and they gave it to us immediately. So why not just give out Evian to start with?

Recently I spoke at a great event called Master Trainer Camp. If you get my bimonthly ezine then you probably saw me share information about the opportunity.

For a moment, I’d like to pull the curtain back and be very vulnerable with you. I wasn’t really sure I wanted to speak at this event. As someone who teaches the value of focusing on your highest payoff opportunities, my radar was going off. I was concerned with new conference producers what would happen and would they be able to pull off their dream! Not only that…but you probably know by now I’m a “Four Seasons” kinda of girl so when I heard we were at a camp, my assistant immediately started scouring for local hotels (didn’t find any…but that part worked out ok anyway.)

I liked the two women who put on the event very much and something in my instincts said…”go.” So I said yes.

Linda Block (all the way from Germany),
myself and Linda Welch.

I’m really glad that I’ve learned to balance my instincts with facts and data.

This was one of the best small events I’ve ever been a “trainer” for. Not only were the other speaker/trainers amazing, but the attendees were truly amazing experts who were ready to explode their speaking and training potential. Some of the people I met are going to impact me forever.

Plus I met some amazing new clients who have jumped on the opportunity for me to help them get focused on their high payoff activities and develop more leverage in their life and business. Yahoo! Here are some pictures of a few of the people I was able to capture a picture with.

Stephan Stavrakis of www.gettingthingsdonenow.
Stephan was a blast to get to know and
he is a phenomenal trainer and NLP master!

Lisa Sasevich (www.theinvisibleclose.com), Graham White (www.effectiveethicalmarketing.com) and me.

Graham introduced me to Lisa last year and she has been a HUGE help
in my speaking success. Graham was instrumental in my new website. I’d never met either in person so it was a ton of fun to hang out with them. Thanks Guys!

Martin Wales of www.customercatcher.com. We’ve never seen
each other speak…it was great to finally get to know each
other rather than a quick “hi” in the hallways.

Lisa, Suzanne Falter-Barns and I decided to take in some of the nature
at the camp and go for a walk. Being on the top of the mountain and see
the fog roll in over the ocean was truly amazing!

For a few months now I’ve been musing over what’s happened at my chiropractor’s office. He has finally lost me as a client and I thought I’d capture the “lesson learned” so we all know exactly what to do if you want to chase clients away.

I should first say that I was an absolute raving fan. This guy is very personable, had completely reasonable prices and I believed his values were truly aligned with making a difference. He also had a great office staff that kept him on time and organized.

Within a two month period I probably referred him to over 20 people. So what went wrong?

First, within a two week period a ton of changes happened. He changed his front office staff to someone really wacky. She scared me and made me feel uncomfortable. Plus she made a ton of mistakes with scheduling. One day I was on a coaching call and she called my cell and home 7 times in a row. I felt like I was being stalked.

Lesson: Always make sure your team is an excellent representation of who you are.

Second, he set up a client mill. He went for the temptation to move more clients through his already very quick adjustment process in record time. One day I walked in and there was just one big adjusting room. He told us that he wanted all the patients to be able to hear what he consulted the other’s on. Yikes! How totally inappropriate.

When we asked for a private room, scary desk lady gave us weird, condescending looks. Double yikes! Note to self, don’t tell her about how scary she is, you never know what could happen.

Lesson: What’s good for your bottom line isn’t always good for your centers of influence and best clients. Remember how to give the VIP treatment for those who you love to work with that don’t fit your “normal” model.

Third, he raised his prices by almost three times. Now, I’m a big proponent of giving yourself a raise. And to be quite honest, he really did undercharge. But there was something that just didn’t seem to add up with a conversation we had about why his prices were so low to begin with.

He told me this long story about a chiropractor who saved his mother’s life when he was a child and how they had no money and that he never wanted ANYONE to ever not get chiropractic support because of money. Then HUGE price increase follows 30 days later.  Hmmmmm…..

Lesson: Be clear and honest with clients at all times so your authentic self shines through.

Last, and this was the cardinal sin for me. He approved a non-traditional office visit time then forgot the appointment. When I asked him about it he blamed his office staff for not reminding him. “OMG!!! He didn’t just blame his staff did he?” Yep, he did. Now granted, they may have made a mistake but I was pissed off that I squeezed in an appointment and took 60 minutes away from him HIGH PAYOFF activities to come meet him and he didn’t have his system in place.

Lesson: Always have systems in place to handle non-routine activities. And NEVER blame your staff. Just own it and ask how you can make it right.

I probably would have been willing to over look many of the issues had he handled that forgotten appointment with integrity. But it was like I got a window into his soul — he’s not in alignment with his truth. He’s scrambling to handle some kind of major “thing” and he’s not on top of his business growth.

Decided to go searching for new chiropractor …again…argh.

Sunday my partner and I decided to find some sunshine in Palm Springs, CA to work on our “vacation tans.” As we were driving out to the desert, we spontaneously migrated from our usual spot at the JW Marriott to La Quinta Resort.

La Quinta is a Waldorf-Astoria 5-star resort just past Palm Desert. It’s lay out is really unique in that it has little “pods” of rooms around a pool area (42 pools in all!)

What was really cool though was as we had lunch by the beautiful garden fountains, we met a man who was walking around with a rare breed of hawk.

“Alex”, the hawk is employed by the hotel to monitor the grounds for rodents and “undesirable” pests on the grounds. I thought it was such an interesting way to let nature manage what might be a problem for a 5-start resort guest (i.e. snakes.)

 
Me and “Alex” the hawk.

While we were out at La Quinta, we also noticed a really great summer program they have for kids. The rates start at $89/night, kids eat free and they even offer kid spa treatments. We are thinking of taking Mark’s daughter for her birthday since she has been hearing us talk about spas forever she is dying to go herself.

If you decide to check it out, let me know how you like it. There is a really great energy at this resort that is a bit more laid back and “rustic” with a Four Season’s level of service that you just can’t beat. And rumor has it that there is a lot of history in those rooms…many famous people from the old movie days have lived there.  

I’ll be going back to, and who knows, maybe we will have our next Platinum Elite Retreat there!

This past weekend I conducted my first 2008 Platinum Elite Mastermind retreat in Palm Desert California at the Miramonte Spa & Resort</