Neale Donald Walsh in his book, The Storm Before the Calm states, “Humanity appears to be stuck….one conversation from paradise. Imagine, a single conversation that could change everything. The seeds of great ideas are often generated from the most mundane conversations with the right people. ”

Not too long ago I had a little a-ha about this myself…

I’m a pretty positive person but I discovered that I was unconsciously having conversations that were draining my life force.

As good of a coach as I am I found myself “buying in” to beliefs about what was possible simply because it was the dominate conversations around me.

I started playing to the “common denominator” instead of focusing on what I do best. I found myself creating new programs at ridiculously low prices vs. staying the course. Not that any of what I created wasn’t powerful and necessary – but it was a deviation from my real genius!

If you find yourself in one of these conversations it might look like:

• Having a series  of failed enrollment conversations with prospects – and believing that what you are charging is too high
• Getting into let’s-help-others-turned-gossip conversations about “who is over-charging, not delivering, taking advantage of others, or not in integrity”
• Only spending time/talking with peers and friends who “think like you” (aka allow you to wallow in your crap)
• Hearing rumblings from your peers of how sales are down, people aren’t buying and they are rapidly running out of cash you start to panic and hoard money
• Watching a news program about one of the many world issues then spending hours proliferating THEIR opinions on Facebook, Twitter and your blog posts.

Inevitably, by being in these kind of seductive conversations you STOP believing in yourself, your dream and the direction you are headed. Influence by the negativity you find yourself focused on problems, challenges and fears. This is a dangerous and ineffective place to make decisions about the future of your business my friend.

A couple of month’s back I attended an event where I spent some quality time with some of my colleagues that I had not seen in a while…and something shifted.

The conversations were different with them.

Instead of feeling drained and discouraged I was inspired and my mind shifted gears. I had a profound epiphany – by buying into the “downslide” I was selling out on my real genius. The predominant conversations I had been having were seductive – good people with real problems with a limited ability to see the truth in the midst of uncertainty.

Listen, lots of people are making LOTS of money right now. There are thought leaders doing great work all over the world. If you are not having the experience you deeply desire then it’s time for you to engage in better conversations!

If you find yourself in a seductive down-slide conversation, you MUST take control and like changing the dial on a radio station to something you like better, change the “conver-station” quickly!

1. Take 100% responsibility for co-creating high energy frequency, positive, life-affirming conversations. Be willing to start and continue powerful conversations designed to inspire others to their greatness…not their fears.
2. Invest in and spend time at events that attract people who don’t just SAY they are about change but LIVE as a positive conversation starter in the world.
3. Steer clear of gossip disguised as “spreading the word.” You can easily shift gears by saying, “I appreciate your opinion and I think we would get better results by focusing on what we DO want to create in our lives.”
4. Get active in communities that are designed to co-create new possibilities (like New Era Success and the soon to be announced Global New Era Leaders Association.)

So which conversations do you need to stop having…and how will you actively seek out more powerful conversations that uplift and inspire you to your greatness? Let’s share some ideas in the comments below.

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Here’s another great conversation to get involved in….and its free! Marcia Wieder, Barbara Stanny, Cynthia Kersey, Drew Gerber, Robin Fisher Roffer, Arielle Ford, Adam Urbanski, Elyse Hope Killoran, Lissa Boles, Liora Mendeollf, Wendy Yellen and myself all sharing insights, resources and strategy to do what you love and profit in your business. Join us now at Answering The Call Today Virtual Summit.

Guest Article By Liora Mendeloff, Founder of Women Speakers Association

(Discover more great wisdom during Answering The Call Virtual Summit, starting February 7th)

How many books do you have to read? How many tapes or cds do you have to listen to? How many seminars or workshops do you have to attend? How many $100,000 inner-circles do you have to join? How many teachers, mentors or therapists will it take until you get…there is no guru OUTSIDE of you!

You might be wondering, “how can the President of the Women Speakers Association be saying such things?” Here’s my point…I’m not dissing teachers, mentors, mastermind partners…all are essential players to have on your team. My question, however, is “when will you be enough that you don’t HAVE TO look outside yourself for validation, guidance, approval, acknowledgement?”

The truth is…you already are your own guru. All the answers, all the guidance, all the love, everything you are seeking, lies within you.

The key is to stop or slow down long enough to tap into that endless well of unlimited abundance that is the very source from which you came. It is there that you will find what you are seeking. It is there, that you will know (in your heart, in your gut) what step to take next, which move is the one to make.

When you can get that YOU are your own guru, all the gifts that come to your through your mentors, teachers, colleagues, etc, are just icing on the cake.

About the Author: Liora Mendeloffis a Speaking Industry Expert, with 20+ years of experience behind-the-scenes with some of the world’s greatest thought leaders, government officials, celebrities and entrepreneurs, in helping them fulfill their vision. Liora’s driving force is to facilitate getting women and their core message out into the world, the purpose behind her newest venture, the Women Speakers Association. Liora also created InstantMediaKit.com, the secret tool used by the Pro’s to get seen, get booked and get paid!

To uncover more nuggets of navigating through your business and evolution, join Liora and 11 other experts for Answering The Call Today Virtual Summit! 

As I read this book I thought, wow, this is good information. I immediately picked up the phone and invited her to be one of the experts in the Answering The Call Virtual Summit.

Why?

Because if your money-stuff isn’t healed you won’t feel confident about saying yes to your calling.

Here are ten insights from the book that will get you to start thinking about where you may be sabotaging your success:

1. Giving away your services, bartering, bad-talking people who have money and blaming others for your bad money situation are all key indicators of being a pattern under-earner. (Her quiz for identifying if you are an under-earner was really powerful.)

2. All under-earners share a common trait of a high tolerance for low-pay. You can earn six figures but still under-earn because you don’t pay YOURSELF.

3. Under earners CRAVE comfort and rarely do what makes them uncomfortable.

4. Under-earners use the same methods to manage their money as they do to make most decisions: avoidance and delusion.

5. Bottom Line: UnderEarning is a condition of low self-esteem. Inside every under-earner lies some degree of hopelessness or helplessness.

6. What you have in your life now is a reflection of what you intrinsically believe you deserve.

7. The most efficient way for entrepreneurs to overcome under-earning is to raise their prices. If you resist this then you are going to continue to under-earn.

8. Create the habit of respecting money by having a good money practice — save, know what your money situation is weekly and read on money savviness every day. A lack of good money habits will be counter-productive to ALL great business growth strategies.

9. Create community with others who are creating healthy wealth systems. Those that “go it alone” will fall prey to their old beliefs, habits and practices faster than those who surround themselves with a healthy money game in life.

10. When you shift out of being an under-earner and make a stand for financial success in your life, you will find that every goal, dream and calling you have will be more “do-able.”

Where have YOU been a pattern underearner? We’d love to hear your journey in the comments below.

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Barbara Stanny is one of 12 of the world’s leading experts on achieving success by following your passion in the  Answering The Call Virtual Summit!  Join us free today!

How our economy continues to decline.

That unemployment is at an all-time high.

Company leaders that are downright lying to the public and their employees so they can continue to build their personal wealth.

How bankruptcy and foreclosures are as common today as credit card approvals were five years ago.

Millions of people who are struggling to put food on the table, let alone discover their purpose and create a thriving business.

Sometimes I want to run up and down Melrose Boulevard screaming “Stop the Madness People!” Well, not really, but the thought has occurred to me that somewhere, somehow, this madness has to shift.

I’ve found that picking up a paradigm-shifting book is the best way for me to re-center myself. Last week I finally started reading “The Storm Before the Calm” by Neale Donald Walsh. As I was browsing through the first few pages this quote literally jumped off the page at me.

“What is needed here is not a revolution on the ground but a revolution of the mind.”

What he is referring to is that we, the people who inhabit this planet, have to stop looking for solutions and fixes out there and start shifting what’s going on inside our heads before anything will change.

Whoa. That’s a lot of responsibility. Create a revolution in our own mind.

But that’s exactly what we have to do…

And here’s how we can do it:

1. Know that everything is made up

Every single thing that happens is neutral in meaning until we as humans attach a meaning to it. What that means is just because something is happening doesn’t mean its bad – or good – it’s just happening. What could happen if we attach a meaning that has more value to the outcome we are pursuing? Heck if it’s all made up anyway then why not make it more fun, more empowering, and realize that we can actually do something about it?

Take for example, your current financial situation. What if you knew that right now in the moment you could actually create the money you are seeking – without struggle or frustration? This paradigm shift is a radical thought for many but its actually possible. Most people just tell themselves it can’t be done.

2. Stop buying into everything the media (or anyone) says

Just because it’s someone else’s reality doesn’t mean it has to be yours. For eleven years I’ve been unraveling the beliefs and decisions that no longer support my clients. The crazy thing is that the reason they are stuck and don’t have the life or business they want is because they listened to what someone else told them – and made it THEIR truth.

Even the media distorts reality — they want you to watch their show. Sales people distort reality – they want you to buy their stuff. Your family/friends distort reality – they have THEIR own experience of the truth. The only thing that matter is what YOU believe and how you act from that belief system.

3. Reconnect to what gets YOU fired up

One of the fastest, most effective ways to revolutionize your thinking is to reconnect to your purpose in life. It’s easy to forget, to let it slip away as we get focused on paying the bills and getting the daily grind of tasks done. Our passion is what fuels our momentum and drive to push past resistance and roadblocks.

When you are connected to your deepest “calling” you are an unstoppable force — a force for good to be reckoned with. If you aren’t on fire, then you haven’t really answered the call to your greatness.

4. Learn how to create your own reality

You can create the success you want by changing the story you tell yourself. It’s what Walsh meant by creating a revolution in your mind first. For anything to change on the outside you have to change what’s happening on the inside. It starts with us then it begins to impact and influence everyone and everything we are involved in.

Take the idea of creating a new reality around money. One of the presenters in the Answering The Call Virtual Summit, Elyse Hope Killoran, teaches “The New Wealth Game: How to Create the Prosperity You Deeply Desire on Demand.” I have found it extraordinarily fascinating how I can shift my financial experience instantly by making up what I want – not what I don’t want!

So what’s your revolution about? Which of these four steps do you know would help you awaken to your full calling in life? We’d love to hear you share it in the comments below. And be sure to join us for the Answering The Call Virtual Summit today!

Your live event that you spend $50k on only sold 10 seats…and now you’re in debt up to your eyeballs.

The business partner you count on for financing has pulled out – in the middle of your big announcement for a new offering.

You just found out that the 10,000 people who opt’d in for your special teleclass never received the announcement to attend the call live.

American Express pulled all your credit lines (even though you have immaculate credit) 2 days after you committed to a $50,000 coaching program.

Maybe you’ve experienced one or more of these situations? Well, congratulations! It means you are in a perfect position to tap your goldmine.

Life is full of unexpected twists and turns. When you are an entrepreneur you might as well increase the opportunity for messy breakdowns by 100. It’s part of the game of owning a small business – you have to take risks to grow and with risk comes the opportunity for failure.

So what do you do when you’ve worked so hard towards a big leap goal only to find it falling apart? Well, let’s start with three things to NOT do.

Blame. Mistakes happen in life and everyone makes them, including you. If someone else is involved it may be very tempting to blame them for the problem. Resist that temptation and start to look for the clues of how to fix that breakdown in the future (aka implement a system, policy or more competent team member.)

Focus on the Problem. When you focus on the problem you get….more of the problem! Acknowledge, diagnose and move on to something else. By focusing on the problem you increase your anger, frustration and negative feelings which will not allow you to be in a good solution-generation mode.

Beat Yourself Up. How many times do you have to tell yourself you screwed up? Once! If even that, right? So why is it that you ruminate over and over again in your head how you could have done something better? Give yourself an hour (or maybe a day if it’s a doozy) and then commit to move past it.

A few years back I had a client who was mortified about a major breakdown in his business. He’d trusted a team member to orchestrate a marketing campaign that was very time sensitive. The team member, having a personal challenge in her own life, didn’t get the direct mail pieces ready in time and by the time they were ready to mail the promotion deadline had expired on the postcard!

Now of course he was furious but instead of turning to blame and firing the team member, we decided to turn it into a gold mine of opportunity by using these three techniques below:

1. Think Bigger Than The Moment.
What my client didn’t know then was that his sales manager was days away from taking an extended leave of absence. A family member fell ill and he had to leave immediately. If the mailers had gone out, there could have been a big collapse on their ability to deliver.

By widening our picture, often times the breakdown is a blessing in disguise. Perhaps if that big sale had gone through, you’d be miserable working with that client for two years. You may have missed the opportunity to be live on Oprah when the call came through. Things happen for a reason. Sometimes you won’t know what it was until later so be aware of what big break is in store for you.

2. Look for the Lesson.
Breakdowns are a sign that you are missing a key component in your infrastructure or procedures. Use the breakdown to strengthen your processes immediately. Bring your team together to look for a solution and implement it quickly.

For instance, if your assistant missed a step in the follow up sequence that cost you a client sale, then look at where the training or the procedure is missing that step.

3. Know When To Fold ‘Em.
As the Kenny Rogers song goes, “You got to know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em…” What if the failure is a sign that it’s time to go a new direction? If something takes a ton of energy, time and money and it’s just not going well, it may be time to let it go and create space for something that is more in alignment with your real power.

Seth Godin wrote a book called, “The Dip: A Little Book That Teaches You When to Quit (and When to Stick).” The concept is that many people hold on to something WAYYYY too long because they just don’t know when to let go.

It may be helpful to remember the saying, “Everything you say yes to means you are saying no to something else.” If you are holding on to the wrong things, you’ll be stiffing your bigger yes.

So what is a “mess” that you are currently frustrated with? Can you think of even just one way it is a blessing? Love to hear your comments in the comments below.

And yet…is that really true?

Ten years ago I knew that I was meant to help spiritual leaders create profitable businesses. For some reason that failed over and over so I gave up on it. But something deep inside of me kept calling me to bring out something much bigger than just helping people build 6 & 7 figure success….and yet I was so caught up in the Kool-Aid I couldn’t see it.

Not too long ago I awoke to a part of me that has lain dormant for a very long time. I finally accepted that my gift is way bigger than being a coach. My own Big Idea Incubation process has awakened my genius – I am more of a spiritual guide to entrepreneurs, thought leaders and transformational coaches who are stuck in being able to succeed in their genius work.

Hmmm. Not really all that different than where I started is it?

The amazing thing is that as I rejected my genius for ten years I ran around collecting evidence to support my decision that I couldn’t be known for that work. There was no money in being a spiritual teacher, was there? Eventually I started asking a better question….

What would have to be true for me to accept that my genius is as a spiritual guide and transformational ass-kicker?

I didn’t have to wait long because within weeks the people, resources and clarity showed up. It’s all part of a simple yet often overlooked approach to learning how to incubate our own big ideas.

When you stop collecting evidence to take you away from your truth then you will become aware of the clues that have always been leading you to your life’s work.

Here’s another example.

Just last week I had an invitation show up to go to Australia for the month of November. I felt the “spark” of yes then immediately started rolling through all the reasons it would not work. All of a sudden I said, “STOP” in my head. I reminded myself that I want this. I want to travel. I want to bring my New Era Entrepreneurship to other countries. Instead of collecting reasons why it wouldn’t work, what would have to happen so it WOULD work?

I immediately became aware that I had a great team, a coach who could handle our calls, and many clients in Australia who would probably love to do a live Mastermind session with me while I’m there. It WOULD work.

So here’s my question for you:

When given the opportunity to say yes – whether it be to a transformational coaching program, the support to help you grow, or an idea that would help you soar — are you collecting evidence to get yourself to YES or NO?

I’d love to hear your thoughts below…

<< Join me on September 7th as I help thousands of entrepreneurs identify THEIR missing link to building a business around their genius (and having a massive impact and success in the process.) >>

In order to get more results, many of us condition ourselves to rise above our mental and physical limitations. We challenge ourselves to achieve the unimaginable in record time.  Often we look around at everyone else, notice what (we think) they are accomplishing, compare ourselves to their success, feel behind, and say, “I should be doing that too!”

We may even find ourselves spouting wisdom from these high achievers with mantras designed to push past our comfort zone such as:

“Come on don’t give up now,  you can do it, push a little harder, just finish up these 10 projects THEN you can go to bed.”

At least, I know I have been here; and still can catch myself in my default mode of hyper-drive with a million to-do’s in record time.

So here’s an opportunity for you to shift deeper into most successful self…

When does it make sense to stop pushing from the “long list of to do’s and the drive to be more” and shift gears into being enough?

Is there a trigger that causes you to default into hyper-drive, struggling to achieve what ego wants (versus staying committed to your genius?)

And do you catch yourself doing things from the space of “being driven” that you later realize were a complete departure from your truth?

Here’s what I’ve discovered about myself.

I have a great strength in achieving extraordinary results in record time.

When I was born the doctor told my mother, “This one will survive anything. You’ll never have to worry about her.”

What she should have said is, “This one has been born to push and struggle her whole life in order to achieve her ego’s desire.”

Whoa.

Huge a-ha.

There is a fine line between challenging ourselves to overcome our perceived limitations and creating a life experience of struggle to keep up with what we think we SHOULD have.

I realized that somewhere along the way I graduated from “challenging myself” to a condition of struggling unnecessarily.

I’m not exactly sure when or where I created this pattern but what I do know is that in this New Era of Entrepreneurship struggle does not work!

Struggle stops the flow of inspired action and in essence shuts off our most essential element of success – passion. It moves us away from our genius and into copying others without any real connection to our truth.

Now if you are thinking to yourself, “I don’t get this, I don’t struggle”, then take a minute and really check in. Do you really never struggle? Do you not push yourself ridiculously hard to achieve things you have no real need for anymore? Do you not feel tired and unmotivated but find yourself glued to the computer screen because its still light outside?  What if we redefined “working hours” and only applied inspired action when we were really juiced up?

Just so we are on the same page, I’m not saying we shouldn’t work hard at times. I’m saying there is a HUGE difference between pushing and struggling to achieve something and being in inspired action where our actions are in flow with our genius.

Have the wisdom to know the difference and your big ideas will take off like wild-fire.

So what have you been struggling with? Share it in the comments below…

But my ego wants to compare.

They can do it but I can’t. Work harder Melanie. Catch up, you are behind. What’s wrong with you?

Comparing my practice to someone else’s can only lead to one of two outcomes:

1. I challenge myself to work harder and stretch myself so I can get better.
2. I stress myself out and start to believe that something is wrong with me.

Most of the time we default into #2, even though we think we are challenging ourselves to achieve more. My ego will take me down when I start to compare myself to others. It’s a slippery slope that will typically lead to a complete demise of my confidence and courage.

I have a client that I’ve worked with over the last three years. “Jason” has a mid-six figure business that we are growing into seven figures. He has all the right strategies except one:

He compares himself to others.

And it eats him up, causes sleepless nights, massive anxiety attacks which leads him to a place of not being focused or productive.

“Janet” does the same thing. She thinks she is being competitive by gauging her success against the success of others. What happens though is she doubts herself, moves into “get it perfect”, makes no progress at all, and then feels panicked. Rather than achieving more she stalls out.

What yoga teaches us is a different approach to success…

Your success is your own journey – what others can accomplish has absolutely no bearing on your journey. By honoring your body, spirit and wisdom you find a path that is YOUR best path. When we compare we take ourselves OFF our own path and onto someone else’s.

Now if you are used to challenging yourself by gauging your success against others this might feel very foreign. But, hey, that’s what growth is right? A new concept. If you are stressed out, finding yourself stalled, start to pay attention to your thoughts. It might be time to liberate yourself from negative thinking patterns to achieve more faster.

Wanna catch Part One, How Yoga Can Heal Your Business Woes?

Then MaryDale comes by and puts a towel under my feet, pulls my hips back and pushes on the small of my back to lengthen my spine.

Then she says, “Beautiful Melanie!”

Shoot, I really thought I had it right.

Yoga is a never ending journey of little tweaks that challenge my belief about what’s possible. As much as I try to focus on being present in the room
I just can’t get it out of my head how much yoga has influenced my business for the better.

I got into yoga 20 years ago when my doctor prescribed it for my overly-stressed out, “Type-A” work ethic. Today I practice yoga because it keeps me grounded and sane. It has become one of my most powerful business mentors.

I’m sure you can imagine the benefits of yoga on your body, mind and spirit – stretching, sweating, holding impossible poses to build up your muscles. But your business —  really?

Yes. And here’s why.  We can learn how to shift our stressed out, limited thinking and shift into a more supportive, effective way of evolving ourselves in business.

Let’s start with the yoga practice of Being Willing to Be Uncomfortable.

Most of the yoga poses that we are guided into challenge me way beyond what I believe I can accomplish. Who would have thought I could balance on one foot while holding the other leg in the air behind me for three minutes without falling over? I often feel angry, frustrated and like giving up as my limbs shake uncontrollably. Then I remind myself, “I can do this.”

Now being uncomfortable by myself would probably lead me to give up  quickly. This is why I invest in yoga classes. First, I want to know how to do it right so I don’t develop bad habits. Secondly, I want to have a space where I am seen – so I won’t give up too early. Being willing to be uncomfortable is a lot easier when you have a mentor or guide to help you through it.

If you were to adopt this same mentality in your approach to business you might find that when you feel uncomfortable, angry or ready to give up is the moment to take a deep breath and keep going. It’s in THAT moment of perseverance that you build up your confidence and achieve what you never imagined possible.

Also, having a mentor to help you see where you are off track is invaluable. Often we think we are doing it right…when really we are just playing out a habit that generates dismal results. One little tweak could mean a huge difference towards the desired result. A mentor who can see how to tweak your approach is priceless, isn’t it.

What I love most about yoga is how I am able to see where my own thinking is what makes me the most uncomfortable of all. If I simply relax into the pose I can experience deep bliss. If I compare myself to everyone else in the class who seems to get it right, my brain goes off into “I’m never going to get this right” and I suffer.

Sound familiar?

Over the new few posts, I’ll cover many of the yogi-practices that have transformed my way of being, which ultimately helped me create life and business success on MY terms.

I’d love to hear if today’s post on being willing to be uncomfortable provided a-ha for you! Just post in the comments below.

Recently I’ve discovered that in order to achieve a certain type of success I’ve had to stop focusing on solving the problem and surrender into it.

Now the first time this concept was revealed to me I rejected it completely. I had up to that point defined much of my success on my innate ability to see a problem, find all the possible ways to solve it, pick the best solution and get into action. I am a problem solver!

So if my next level of success is based on NOT solving problems, what on earth will people want from me then? And how do you move through a situation you do not want if you don’t solve a problem?

This was a real mind-bender for me!

So of course, I kept doing what I always did – finding ways to solve the problem.

Guess what, the problem came back. This time in a more painful way.

I heard the advice again, “Melanie, when you focus on the problem you give energy to it. What if you just focus on the outcome you deeply desire.”

Ok, I think I’m getting this now. Focus on what I DO want. In this case what I wanted was to feel liberated – I imagined what it might be like to have the feeling of peace, total bliss and to know that everything I might need was taken care of without me having to strategize, figure it out or solve a problem.

Ten minutes later my brain has contorted back into how to fix the problem but what had shifted was my awareness. I deeply realized that many of us when faced with a new way to create our desired outcomes get frustrated – it’s new, it’s scary, its foreign and it’s just a heck of a lot easier to slide back into our old ways of getting things done. At least we feel like there is movement – even it if takes longer to get there, right?

My new self had an epiphany – as we enter into this new era of entrepreneurship we have to trust the unknown to get to a new level of success. We can’t keep sliding back into the comfort zone where we know what to do. Its time to say yes to new strategies and release the old paradigm approach that often results in short term wins at the expense of a long term pay off.

So this problem you have is actually an opportunity. It’s a fork in the road. Instead of worrying, ruminating and trying desperately to fix it, what if you acknowledged the situation, surrender to understanding the opportunity in it, and focus on what you ideally do want? Then claim that?

Sound too hard? It might be. That’s OK if its where you are at. But remember, struggling to solve a problem just creates more drama, chaos and negative energy in your life.

How about we try it out, just this once. What have you got to lose, right? I’d love to hear what you “opportunity” is and what you truly desire. Post it below in the comments (or if you are in my new live webcast series, Four Strategies to Thrive With Your Big Idea in the New Era, then you’ll have a chance to bring it to the 5th webcast for a live hot seat!)