Have you ever said yes to something like a speaking gig, book deal, or even a client and soon wondered why you agreed to it? In the moment the opportunity sounded good…but when reality settled in you realized you’d said yes to something that either wasn’t a good fit or would simply drain too much of the energy you needed for higher priorities?

I had a client who was a people-pleaser once. This client had the “hand-raising” disease that many of us suffer from because we want to do the right thing. Every time a client asked her if she could take on a new project, whether or not it fit into her scope of work, she would raise her hand and say yes.

The trouble was that she was so busy doing things for everyone else (and usually not getting paid) that there was no time for the things she really wanted to be doing. And there certainly wasn’t time for the tasks that actually brought money in the door.

If this story is sounding familiar then I want you to tattoo this quote of mine to your forehead:

Everything you say yes to means you are saying no to something else.

Many of us say yes to things that prevent us from reaching our desired results. We end up becoming overwhelmed with tasks that don’t’ matter and we become the bottleneck to our biggest dreams and goals because we think we have to do everything ourselves.

Recently I attended a weekend event by Roger Hamilton of Wealth Dynamics. One of the key phrases he used all weekend long was, “It’s what you stop doing that will make you a success.”
It’s true. The truly successful people say NO more than they say YES. It’s not always easy but it’s necessary if you want to fulfill YOUR mission on this planet. You can not be everything to everybody and achieve your desired outcome. It’s just not possible.

So how do you know what to say no to?

Here is a simple formula that I use to help me make the tough decisions:

1. Will saying yes to this opportunity help me reach my desired outcome faster?
2. Will I feel excited and have fun working with these people?
3. Will I feel proud to be a part of it when it’s done?
4. Am I really focusing on my top 20% activities or is it a “Bright Shiny Object?”

It might help if I share a few examples of where this shows up for me.

• Speaking engagements. Identifying the ones best aligned with our target audience and the people I most want to serve. (PS Watch for a tool that I’ll release soon to help you with this one).
• Joint venture opportunities. Not every partnership is a good fit. Know what makes for a good fit and you will save a ton of time, energy AND money.
• Masterminds and special interest groups. I’ve been invited to participate in quite a few over the years and one thing I know is that you have to feel connected to the people and the process or else it ends up feeling like work.
• Marketing tactics. There are tons of “visibility” opportunities that we say no to because either they are unpredictable or not paying off.
• Travel. I could be on the road every day of the year but I say no to most of it so that I can focus on doing what I do best – mentoring, creating and leading my company.
• Relationships. Yep, I say no to a lot of people being in my life. Sometimes because I don’t trust or respect them, sometimes because they simply take too much energy to be around and other times because I just don’t have time. It’s OK to not have to fill your life up with requests to spend time with people just because they want you to. This can also include team members who are not in the right seat on your bus too!

The key here is to be willing to say no in order to get to the greater yes. This is a habit that you must adopt in order to be someone who can create consistent 6 & 7 Figure income in your life.

So what are you saying yes to? What do you need to start saying no to in order to get the results you want? Go ahead and post just one thing you will STOP doing now to create more room for what you do want!

Share your comments here.

About the Coach:

Melanie Benson Strick, The Million Dollar Lifestyle Business Coach, teaches entrepreneurs how to stop feeling overwhelmed so they can create more money, more freedom and more prestige.

Get the Entrepreneur’s Secret Weapon to revolutionize your results and get on the fast-track to a freedom based business at www.thepowerofthevirtualteam.com

 

 Say NO More Than Yes [14:15m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download (318)

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, October 7th, 2008 at 8:00 am and is filed under Business Goals, Podcast. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.